Common Pitfalls and How to Avoid Them
Even the best-planned empathy interviews sometimes take wrong turns. You may prepare carefully, yet still find things don’t go as planned. Maybe your questions don’t come out the way you hoped, your interviewee gives short answers, or the conversation suddenly feels tense. That’s normal. Interviewing is a skill you build, and you’ll learn something new with every conversation.
This guide will help you recognize common interview mistakes and recover gracefully when they happen.
When you recognize an interview mistake happening, recover gracefully, and make a mental note for the future. Here are some of the most common pitfalls and what you can do to handle them with tact and poise.
1. Talking Too Much
It’s easy to slip into explanation mode. You care deeply about your project and want people to understand your goals. But when you talk more than you listen, you risk crowding out the very insights you came to discover. Jessica Jackley, co-founder of Kiva, writes about learning this lesson in her early fieldwork with small-scale entrepreneurs, realizing that showing up ready to listen was more powerful than showing up ready to explain.
Try this: Think of yourself as a learner, not a teacher. Ask your question, pause, and give space for silence. People often need a few seconds to gather their thoughts, and those pauses can lead to richer discoveries.
2. Asking Leading or Loaded Questions
Wanting validation or agreement from your conversation partner is natural. But questions like “Don’t you think this new program would help?” invite only agreement, not reflection. That shuts down the ideas you came to discover.
Try this: Turn leading questions into open ones. Try, “What do you think might help?” or “How would that idea work in your community?” Good questions don’t suggest an answer. They give space for detailed, authentic responses and invite stories.
3. Lack of Rapport or Trust
If your interviewee seems distant, polite, or unengaged, it may not be the topic. It might be your personal connection. Empathy grows over time, and trust is earned.
Try this: Start small, maybe with a few casual questions before turning on your recorder. Begin with light, everyday questions before moving into deeper territory. Listen actively and show genuine curiosity about their experiences.
To get beyond a surface-level conversation, ask for specific stories. “Can you tell me about a time when that happened?” Be transparent about your purpose. You may need to repeat this point from your initial request when setting up the interview. Allow people the time to decide what they will share. Silent moments may signal reflection, not resistance.
If someone still seems disengaged, it may simply mean they are not the right person for this conversation right now. Thank them for their time, close out the conversation smoothly, and move on.
4. Overinterpreting or “Reading In”
Sometimes we think we know what someone meant and we jump to conclusions before confirming. These misunderstandings will need to be corrected later as you move forward with your plan. You may also give the impression that you don’t care enough to get things right.
Try this: Practice reflective listening. Paraphrase back what you heard: “So you’re saying that the main challenge isn’t the process, but the timing?” This small habit prevents big misunderstandings and shows respect for the other person’s perspective.
5. Ethical or Sensitivity Lapses
An empathy interview is a partnership built on respect. When interviewers push too far beyond the trust level they have established or seem careless about people’s feelings or the situation, trust erodes quickly. Be sure they know you will treat their information with sensitivity and integrity. Your interviewee’s comfort always comes before your data.
Try this: Be transparent about your goals and how the interviewee’s words will be used. You likely did this when you set up the interview, but review it again. You might then ask, “Is this still a good time for you?” which allows them to defer or decline the interview. When I am recording an interview, I always confirm at the start that they are still okay with being recorded before turning on the recorder. Then I start recording and give a short header with:
“This is [your name], and today is [date]. I am interviewing [name] about [topic]. Is it OK if I record this interview?”
That way they will feel more in control, and you will have a record of their consent.
Respect boundaries. If someone doesn’t want to answer a particular question, move on. Always anonymize sensitive stories when sharing them later.
6. Confirmation Bias
It’s natural to look for patterns that confirm what you already believe. But doing so can blind you to what’s really being said. After ethics comes objectivity. It’s easy to overlook how our expectations shape what we hear.
Try this: Listen for contradictions and differences. If everyone seems to agree with you, ask yourself whether you’re hearing a full range of voices. Seek alternative viewpoints. To widen your perspective, ask, “Has anyone experienced this differently?” As Stanford’s d.school reminds us, listening only to supportive voices can leave you blind to the full picture.
7. Resistance or Hostility
Once in a while, an interviewee may seem irritated, defensive, or even angry. It’s unsettling, but it doesn’t mean you did something wrong.
Try this: Stay calm and listen. Acknowledge the emotion: “This sounds like a difficult topic,” or “I can see this is frustrating.” Or maybe, “Is this still a good time to talk about this?” They may be having a rough day.
If needed, end the conversation politely and promptly. Reflect afterward: Did the topic strike a nerve, or was the person focused on personal or work issues? Or maybe they simply are not the right fit?
Every difficult encounter teaches you something about preparation, tone, and framing, as well as identifying important considerations or flash points. You may need to find alternative ways to learn more about this topic. These moments remind us that empathy interviews happen between people, not scripts.
How to Recover Gracefully
Even the best interviews have awkward moments. The key is in how you handle them.
If you ask a clumsy question, just acknowledge it: “That didn’t come out right. Let me try again.”
If you realize afterward that something felt off, jot a quick reflection in your notes: What happened? What can you do differently next time?
Remember that humility and honesty go a long way. People value sincerity more than polish.
The Takeaway
Empathy interviewing takes practice, and you shouldn’t expect to get everything right the first time or even the tenth. I still make mistakes, but I’m getting better at smoother recoveries. Each misstep teaches you something valuable about people, communication, and yourself as a researcher. Notice what works, adjust what doesn’t, and keep respect and curiosity at the center. That’s how you turn every interview, easy or difficult, into progress.
In the next post, we’ll look at alternatives to interviews. We’ll explore how to do a deep-dive research process that blends conversations, observation, and digital investigation for richer insights.
Sources & Further Reading
- Estes, F. (2022). Design Thinking: A Guide to Innovation.
- Jackley, J. (2010). Clay Water Brick: Finding Inspiration from Entrepreneurs Who Do the Most with the Least. Spiegel & Grau.
- Jackley, J. (2015, June 8). Tapping Into the Inner Entrepreneur. Stanford Graduate School of Business – Insights.
- Stanford d.school. (n.d.). Empathy Interview Guidelines. Retrieved from https://dschool.stanford.edu/resources
- IDEO.org. (2015). The Field Guide to Human-Centered Design. IDEO.org.
- Vechakul, J. (2016). Human-Centered Design for Social Impact: Case Studies of IDEO.org and the International Development Design Summit. UC eScholarship.
https://escholarship.org/uc/item/6sc788r6 - Vechakul, J., Shrimali, B. P., & Sandhu, J. S. (2015). Human-Centered Design as an Approach for Place-Based Innovation in Public Health: A Case Study from Oakland, California. Maternal and Child Health Journal.
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